Well I don't know if I'm okay or not... Was talking to my love earlier today and I just realised that I'm pretty weird - In a way.

Since young, I've always liked the idea of torturing animals and find great pleasure in seeing them in such a state. The feeling is hard to describe. You are on top of the world when you torture, see them in pain make me grin in delight.

As sick as that might sound, but that's also the fact. Many things I've experienced so far, with more wild imaginations at hand and I must say sometimes I disturb people by my shocking revelation.
Some too outrageous, I decline to tell ANYONE what I've had in my mind.

Nowadays its just the pleasure to torturing animals, specifically insects.
I would not harm cats, dogs, or any form of pets myself as I find it too gruesome to handle.
Never a human being, of course.

Strangely, I am easily disturbed with pictures of others abusing vulnerable puppies/kittens but never angered. Seeing the people beating dogs to death for their fur wasn't particularly a favorite scene.

When I see an insect, I squirm. I hate insects and whenever I see an insect, I'll do harm to it.
Be it burning the insect alive, leaving it for a few seconds completely crawling or pulling one by one of its legs while it is still alive. I don't kill anything beautiful, though. I will less likely pull the wings of a pretty butterfly but wouldn't say no to doing the same thing to a dull moth.
I would dissect an ant's or any insect's abdomen away from its body, leaving it to run recklessly in pain - I hope.

Then there is the live animal cooking. I'm easily excited if I see a fish being fried on its body (but with it's existing breathing head) and amused by it's life torture. Or if I see a fish being sliced alive while I eat it's flesh, that would most likely be the food/restaurant I would say it's my favorite.

I'll never abuse cats, dogs, and pets. If I find the subject too much of a beauty and cuteness, I will never abuse such things. Only ugly looking insects.

I'll just have to make sure these insects don't come haunting me on my graveyard - which I think they most probably will